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Mica Sage's avatar

First of all, *yes* to The Good Place! I love that show so much.

I'm really proud of your friend L for doing the hard, scary decision of calling things off. I was a chronic people-pleaser for much of my life as well, and that first step into self-sovereignty is so absolutely gut-wrenching. It gets easier from there. She has an internet stranger rooting for her! :)

I wish I could say people grow out of the petty drama as they age, but it would be a lie. I had a close friend, someone I really trusted (not easy for me), ice me out over a miscommunication last year. There was a schedule mix-up, but instead of talking to me, she literally walked away from me when I approached her and didn't answer my texts for two months. She's in her mid-30s. Prefrontal cortex maturation only gets you so far, I'm afraid, ha. We did talk eventually, and we're civil now, but I lost that trust in her.

I love your premise that we owe each other the benefit of the doubt. We *do* need each other to survive, to grow, to become. And we can't do that if we're jumping to conclusions, being petty, or simply not communicating.

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gia's avatar

completely agree. communication and willingness to understand are forms of love in itself!

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